Normal people going to the kitchen to drink water...
Me going to the kitchen to drink water at night: Normal people aren’t going to the kitchen at night for WATER. Pffft
I don’t like these little girls. They keep calling me an alien bunny and they have hairy legs.
You and your charm creep closer, closer in here, Like a fool for fire I fall...– Adele knows
I think my parents hid my Hogwarts letter
crystalsprinkles: I’m way too cool to be a muggle
letslinger asked: I just wanted to tell you how gorgeous you are and how much I love you! Thanks for coming over to my house to hang out with me! You are the LIFE of the party!!!!! You have made my life 100% better. Thank you.
Si hablas español dale reblog a este post
sexybigass: okay so this looks like a fatter, shorter version of maggie. :’(
It’s been like three weeks since I’ve stayed up until five in the morning listening to talk about video games I don’t give a damn about. I enjoyed every minute of it. ^^^^Lame and cheesy. Now, how I managed to stay up this late after hardly any sleep and being on the lake all day blows my mind. Probably because I ate FOUR meals today. FOUR HEARTY LEGIT MEALS. I have a...
goin on vaycay
littlebabybird: Expectation: Reality: HARHAR
I need to be slapped
I would sell my soul to Davy Jones right now if it meant I could go back to sleep. FUCK EVERYTHING THAT IS THE DENTIST. alskdgjasd;lkgjS;DPIJG’idskjfa
jesus-manuel92 asked: How you doin'?
Even Pandora thinks I’m hispanic… All the commercials and advertisements have been in spanish today. Huuuuuuuu
on the fucking real… WHERE IS MY CAT???????
macmoosie asked: why are we so damn awesome?
Mackenzie and I, Junior Year
Me: Well, I hate to tell you this, but I have your mom locked in my basement. She washes my dishes.
Mack: ...Oh, well that's cool, if you like that sort of thing...hmmm... Hitler was a bitch...he's annoying....So JUSTINE how's your book, Mein Kampf, selling?
Me: Quite well, thanks to your dad. He bought over a hundred copies. He takes the pages and rubs them all over his body, what?
Mack: Well, I think you have yourself and my dad mixed up...why is you grabbing my legs gurl?!? What you want? Some money?
Me: I like to grab your legs. Yum. JK, I don't want your meat and crackers. Are you still getting that tattoo? I think it looked something like this: (A sketch of a swastika was drawn next)
Mack: oh yeah the one you designed during WWII? No, I don't think so... it's a little too skankish if you ask me... you should know that word, skankish. Derived from the name Carmen Justine Sulliskank...Just thought i'd remind you! :D
Me: Prick, my name is spellled CarmAn. What a foolish mistake. here, this is your AIDS medication for the day. you forgot to take it this morning.
Mack: thanx's what would i do without you CarMAN Sandiego??? So how's your AIDS coming along? and how's your job? i hear youre a car man now? That's so niff.
Me: That word is probably the gayest word i have ever seen? and my car job is great. i hear you're still unemployed? my offer for you to mow my lawn still stands.
Mack: no, little did you know you actually aren't employed. you just randomly show up at the shop....they don't say anything to you because your face scares and confuses them... I mean, I'd be scared too if some random man came in to my shop and started speaking German and hailing every 5 minutes.
Me: Oh, well... you know, we should stop fighting. I really am glad you have a car now... i was hoping you'd have a place to sleep other than under the overpass by the skate castle.
Just had quite a successful phone conversation because there were no girls yelling in the background COUGHcourtneypaigeCOUGH :D jk luvyacourtz
marfmellow: In Relationships: A woman will never... →
marfmellow: let me break this down for you: when you text a woman ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL day and then the next day say nothing…not a damn thing…we’re going to feel some type of way. when you send a “good morning baby, hope you slept well” text….we’re hoping we get it again and shit if we do we hope it doesn’t…
schmandrea asked: oh man, okay, I'll buy one. O__________________O head turn
Uh, why is the “Today’s Alternative” station on Pandora playing Nirvana and Smashing Pumpkins? Stupid.
i want some cheese fries so bad.
I just consumed eight cookies. I can’t move. Courtney just exfoliated my back and now she’s cleaning my bathroom. I don’t deserve such things. Broughters 4 lyfe.
MY world is ending because MY CAT RAN AWAY. Please, somebody find her and bring her back to me. I have been so mean to her this week because she’s been cranky which is totally not her fault and I left her for a year so she’s probably just bitter and I didn’t love on her so she ran away this is my fault. D: WHY WON’T SHE COME BACK?